Why I Don’t Look In The Mirror And Tell Myself I’m Hot

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Information about Why I Don’t Look In The Mirror And Tell Myself I’m Hot

Published on March 9, 2014

Author: jeremyngyw

Source: slideshare.net


Be clear of the difference between your physical appearance and whatever your definition of beauty is. Focus on things that truly matter.

Why I Don’t Look In The Mirror And Tell Myself I’m Hot (This article is from a blog post in JersPassageway.com) Let me guess. Some guru told you to look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself you’re beautiful. Every. Single. Morning. When you get out of the bed. That’s it, mindfuck yourself like there’s no tomorrow! Because your subconscious mind cannot determine what’s true and what’s completely false right? So go on, just keep brainwashing yourself. I mean, soon enough then, you’re really going to get all pretty and sexy right? WRONG. But wait. Obviously that’s wrong. What you wanted to hear was that you’ll eventually BELIEVE that you’re beautiful. And that’s all that matters. Right? Wrong again. In this post, I’m going to talk about 3 things. 1. Why I don’t mix up physical appearance and beauty

2. Why you should stop valuing physical appearance more than beauty (or almost anything else, really) 3. Why either of them should still matter Looking in the mirror and telling myself I’m hot What if I tell you that where ever I go, people call me a fuckface. Every new clique of friends I get myself into, my nickname appears to be fuckface. Not only that, people tell me in my face that I do indeed have a face that looks like one. I get it, I’m hideous as hell. I do think so myself. It affects my self-esteem, I’m unhappy, I’m afraid to meet people with confidence, and I just feel terrible. So what do I do?      I go to a guru and he tells me to look in the mirror every morning and tell myself I’m hot. He tells me to smile every day because it’s the most attractive thing about a person. He tells me to show gratitude. Look at the bright side of life because the more positive you feel, the more beautiful you’ll feel too. He tells me to appreciate my flaws. Because imperfection is the new beautiful. And he tells me to look confident whether I really am or not. All these are very good pieces of advice, but for a very different purpose. Let’s face it. The very fact I came to the guru shows that my physical appearance means something for me. By seeking these answers, I’m looking for a compromise for what I’m lacking in terms of the way I LOOK. I’m associating these answers with my ugly LOOKS. But guess what? I’m still called a fuckface, and I’m still treated as though I had one. I still don’t get the visual attention I deserve, and I feel like shit as usual. I would then go home and put the guru’s advice into action all over again, until I’ve brainwashed myself to feel good about the way I look. And the cycle repeats. Doesn’t sound like a viable solution for me. What you need to realise is that the guru doesn’t tell you something. He doesn’t tell you that the advice he’s giving you is essentially about genuine beauty, not physical appearance. AND THAT’S WHERE YOU’RE MIXING UP THE TWO. And that’s why it doesn’t work. In fact, he also doesn’t tell you one more hard truth, because it will hurt you. So I will do the dirty job and say it for him. Because I promise you, this truth will set you free. People call you a fuckface because you’re indeed hideous looking, and there’s nothing much you can do about it. I’m telling you to fuck it because that shouldn’t be something of too much concern.

And that’s coming from a guy who thinks he’s ugly by the way. (Okay fine, below average.) Which leads me to my next point. Valuing too much on physical appearance When people say “beauty is in the eye of the beholder,” they are quite right. It means that someone who is attractive might not seem as so to another. But what does beauty mean to you? Obviously, it would be different for everyone. It could be a multitude and a combination of things. It’s an entity that goes beyond skin deep. It involves all five senses, plus a sixth, whatever that might be. Think hard about it. Let it sink in. Now let me tell you what physical appearance is. It’s a rating others label you with. Period. So how does that comparison sound now? Do you want to focus on that label, or do you want to focus on your beauty and the things in life that truly matter to you? Do you want to attract people because of that label, or do you want to attract people because you have an awesome personality, people love being around you, people feel empowered by you, and because people are inspired by you? And is someone who is attracted to you only because of that label really worth your attention and love in the first place? Enough said. Stop placing so much value on physical appearance and you’ll find that you’ll naturally start harnessing your efforts on the things that truly matter. That includes your beauty.

I’m not saying you won’t be hurt by being called a “fuckface.” What I’m saying is that you’ll stop trying to fix a lost case which shouldn’t have mattered in the first place. So why should I care about how I look at all? While you have little control over how your body looks, you do have easy control over how you dress. Dress for the occasion and never be sloppy about it. Put in effort to look presentable. That could be something as simple as not having a half-tucked in shirt. It’s no longer about attraction and whatnot. It’s about your self-image and attitude. Have a sloppy image and attitude and people will treat you the same way you dress. If you think it’s okay to be obese, think again. That’s about your health, so go do something about it. And when you’re obese, probably the easiest way to looking physically better is to lose weight anyway. If there’s one take away from this post, let it be to start shifting your focus to the things in life that truly matter to you. Your physical appearance should never be the most attractive thing about you. I want you to know that you have true beauty in you. And if you can’t find it in others to tell you that, then you’ll just have to find it in yourself. ~Helping you become the best version of yourself~

Jeremy writes about everything Personal Growth at his blog, Jer’s Passageway. Do give his blog a visit, he would love to connect with you!

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