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what they didnt tell you about teaching

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Information about what they didnt tell you about teaching
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Published on January 26, 2009

Author: ravionly431

Source: authorstream.com

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What they didn’t tell you : What they didn’t tell you About teaching : About teaching Twas the night before term starts : Twas the night before term starts And all through the house : And all through the house Not a creature will be stirring : Not a creature will be stirring Except you still marking : Except you still marking Whilst your friends have a life : Whilst your friends have a life You won’t! : You won’t! You suddenly find yourself saying : You suddenly find yourself saying “I can’t not on a school night” : “I can’t not on a school night” “Friends become distant acquaintances : “Friends become distant acquaintances That you catch up with Christmas and Birthdays : That you catch up with Christmas and Birthdays You find yourself telling people the same thing in three different ways : You find yourself telling people the same thing in three different ways When it’s the end of term : When it’s the end of term When it’s the end of term You won’t be doing this : You won’t be doing this You will be doing this : You will be doing this Or this : Or this Teaching is like being a comedian : Teaching is like being a comedian Your audience expects to be entertained : Your audience expects to be entertained So expect heckling at every opportunity : So expect heckling at every opportunity Punters to talk over you : Punters to talk over you Continual trips to the loo : Continual trips to the loo Rustling of stashed crisp packets : Rustling of stashed crisp packets And if you are really nervous : And if you are really nervous They CAN smell your fear : They CAN smell your fear And will turn into this : And will turn into this You must always be positive : You must always be positive Even when you want to do this : Even when you want to do this When you go shopping : When you go shopping Spotting you will be the highlight of their day : Spotting you will be the highlight of their day Except they don’t want your autograph : Except they don’t want your autograph They are just amazed you are actually a real person : They are just amazed you are actually a real person If you are really hated or loved it will like having your own paparazzi : If you are really hated or loved it will like having your own paparazzi With your shopping trip documented on You Tube : With your shopping trip documented on You Tube So drive 40 miles away if you want any of these : So drive 40 miles away if you want any of these And you will need to find alternatives to swear words : And you will need to find alternatives to swear words Fudge it! Shoot Oh Billiards And learn a whole new version of the English language : And learn a whole new version of the English language You gypsy Chav That’s so gay Minger But there are positives! : But there are positives! You get to watch interesting student debates : You get to watch interesting student debates Attend inspiring meetings : Attend inspiring meetings Enjoy the thrill of not being listened too all day : Enjoy the thrill of not being listened too all day Being spoken to like a piece of … : Being spoken to like a piece of … Endure teenage hormones that even parents don’t want to put up with : Endure teenage hormones that even parents don’t want to put up with Have your performance constantly measured : Have your performance constantly measured But the ultimate in pleasure has to be . . : But the ultimate in pleasure has to be . . Just when you get teaching sussed out : Just when you get teaching sussed out You get a new Government initiative : You get a new Government initiative That was ditched 15 years ago for what reason? : That was ditched 15 years ago for what reason? So why teach? : So why teach? For love? : For love? For respect? : For respect? For money? : For money? The excellent pension? : The excellent pension? NO ? : NO ? Well there is a credit crunch! : Well there is a credit crunch! And finally what do you call a group of like minded teachers? : And finally what do you call a group of like minded teachers? A whinge! : A whinge!

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