Stop and Prevent Bullying - Why victim becomes the victim?

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Information about Stop and Prevent Bullying - Why victim becomes the victim?
Health & Medicine

Published on February 6, 2014

Author: cybahal



Combined Associative and Cognitive approach to generate self confidence
The way to Stop Bullying


Some Undesirable Behaviours  Becoming anxious in social settings  Staying in unsatisfying relationship  Being Overweight  Fear of facing challenges in life  Inability to be expressive and assertive

Do we choose to have them? The answer is Yes and No Some of these habits are conscious and some unconscious  We need to answer this question: Where do habits come from?

Two Type of Habits Action - Oriented going toward the goal Stress - Response Running away from pain

Habit Structure Any habit always has 3 elements: Routine The Behaviour itself. Perfected with Repetition Cue The trigger that activates the habit. It can be conscious or unconscious Reward activation of pleasure centre of brain or erasing pain

The Routine(Behaviour) What we can do to achieve the outcome

Reward (Outcome) The Outcome is what we are looking for.

Why do we behave against ourselves? 1. We don’t know much about the cues that trigger our behaviour 2. Our minds contradict us The challenge of your BODY  Our mom or dad’s frown  Looking beautiful & receiving  The Scent of a favourite food attention. Feeling light and fresh in your body vs.  Stopping eating delicious food. Going through sweaty exercises. Losing time to spend with your loved ones or work. from childhood  Seeing old friends become successful  Feeling abandoned

Cognitive model to change habits Old behaviour becomes weaker Old Outcome New Outcome Old Outcome New Outcome Old Outcome New Outcome New behaviour becomes Stronger One way to deal with different outcome is to Decide to go towards the outcome, Focus on it and repeat the action until new behaviour becomes dominant. We Consciously form new cues and habits to reach the outcome. The old cue and behaviour are still in our mind.

Examples of outcomes that contradict  I want to become more self-confident. But what would others think of me if I become assertive?  I want to study to learn new things. But I want to hang out with others to have fun.  Being in a relationship is fantastic. but I can't find the right partner  I want to be successful, but if I am, I won't have time for my family and friends

Where do my cues come from? Vs. Cues are the result of our interaction with the world and the perception that we hold within us. They shape up from the moment we are born. They are conscious or unconscious reasoning behind our decisions.

Where the cues come from - 2 Perceptual memory • Observing an abusive relationship • My dad lost his job because of one rich competitor Conceptual memory • Abusive relationships are normal • All rich people are evil Cues are memories and concepts we hold in our minds. They work because of the interchanges between our conceptual memories and our perceptual memories processed in our brains.

Our Perceptions My dad left us I am all alone Nobody loves me Love doesn’t exist It is better to stay with A cheater than not Having the love I need If I love them, They will leave Me We choose concepts in life based on our perceptions of events. Early events have the most influence over our perceptions. These usually solidify over time through synaptic consolidation.

Stress-Response Habits Feeling stressed out. Lots of painful pressure on your stomach. Eating will fill up you stomach. You won't feel the pain We usually find random ways to cope with stress. Escaping by drinking, smoking, taking drugs and so on.

Associative model to change habits There is no reason for old behaviour Old Outcome New Outcome New Outcome New Outcome New behaviour will be the only behaviour In the associative model, we change the structure of the cue. By disconnecting the link between the outcome and the cue, the behaviour won’t be relevant anymore. There is no Reason for it.

Reality of our behaviours Success Happiness Love One cue can even trigger another cue. Security In reality, our habits, cues and routines are forming a complex structure. One habit might have several cues or one cue may trigger multiple behaviours. We need to know what to work on.

Cognitive or Associative Changing your behaviour based on willpower alone can be very hard when different habits are running below the surface. Only a small part of the brain is devoted to decision making. Using VMPF We can only focus on changing one habit at a time while everything else is in the background. Decision making region of brain VentroMedial Prefrontal Cortex

Cue Structure Cues are made of conceptual and perceptual memories. We store these in our brains likes books on a shelf. Every memory acquired needs to find its own place. We recall and look at it many times until is becomes stable. This is called the Synaptic Consolidation process.

Alter the Cue Structure Each time we recall our memories we go into the process of Reconsolidation. We now know that if we diminish our inhibitory actions in the prefrontal cortex, we can relocate our memories and change the structure of our Cues. This process is usually quick and pain free.

Bullying Habits and Cues  I am being bullied I don’t say anything I am overweight I am different They don’t want to be my friends  I am nobody This is just one examples of habitual structure that I have encountered with one of my clients. There are many more and everyone has their own unique cues and behaviours.

NERA The benefits of Reassociation: • Change is very quick • The structure doesn’t go back to its previous state • If Combined with CBT, Results become permanent • Use of willpower is minimized Do you want to see if it works for you? Book a free 30 minutes session Resources: 1 - The role of the basal ganglia in habit formation 2 – CBT Process : Cognitive Behavioural therapy 3 - Priming and Multiple Memory Systems: Perceptual Mechanisms of Implicit Memory 4 - BDNF function in adult synaptic plasticity: The synaptic consolidation hypothesis 5 - Weight control during the holidays: Highly consistent self-monitoring as a potentially useful coping mechanism 6 - Different Contributions of the Human Amygdala and Ventromedial Prefrontal Cortex to Decision-Making 7 - Extinction during reconsolidation of threat memory diminishes prefrontal cortex involvement Cyrus H. Sabounchi Call 0421 136 102 for more information

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