Fun at Call Centre!!!

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Information about Fun at Call Centre!!!

Published on May 11, 2007

Author: rahul



Read my Blog:
no offense, but its really funny...



  1 ) Tech Support    : "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."         Customer    : "Ok."      Tech Support   : "Did you get a pop-up menu?"      Customer    : "No."      Tech Support   : "Ok. Right click again. Do you   see a pop-up menu?"      Customer    : "No."      Tech Support    : "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what  you have done up   until this point?"      Customer    : "Sure, you told me to write 'click'   and I wrote 'click'."  

2) Customer    : "I received the software update  you sent, but I am still getting the same error  message."       Tech Support    : "Did you install the update?"        Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it  to get it to work?"

      3)Customer   : "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."      Tech Support   : "Tell me what you've done."      Customer    : "I typed 'A: SETUP'."      Tech Support   : "Ma'am, remove the disk and     tell me what it says."      Customer   : "It says '[PC manufacturer] Restore   and Recovery disk'."       Tech Support     : "Insert the MS Word setup   disk."      Customer     : "What?"      Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"     Customer: "No..."

      4).Customer   : "Do I need a computer to use your software?"      Tech Support   : ?!%#$   (welll pretend to smile)       5).Tech Support    : "Ok, in the bottom left hand   side of the screen, canyou see the 'OK' button displayed?"      Customer    : "Wow. How can you see my screen from   there?"       Tech support   :  ##### ***

6) Tech Support : "What type of computer do you have?"      Customer   : "A white one."     Tech support  :  ******_____#### 7). Tech Support   : "What operating system are  you running?"      Customer   : "Pentium."     Tech support    :  ////-----+++ 8). Customer   : "My computer's telling me I   performed an illegal abortion."       Tech support   :  ??????

      9).Cus tomer   : "I have Microsoft Exploder."      Tech Support  : ?!%#$ 10).Customer    : "How do I print my voicemail?"         Tech support   :  ??????

11). Customer   : "You've got to fix my computer.  I urgently need to print document, but the computer      won't boot properly."     Tech Support    : "What does it say?"     Customer   : "Something about an error and non-system disk."     Tech Support   : "Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?"     Customer   : "No, but there's a sticker saying  there's an Intel inside."    Tech support   :  @@@@@

12). Tech Support: "Just call us back if  there's a problem. We're open 24 hours."      Customer: "Is that Eastern time?" 13). Tech Support   : "What does the screen say  now?"      Customer   : "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."      Tech Support   : "Well?"      Customer   : "How do I know when it's ready?"    Tech support   :  *** ---- ++++

14). A plain computer illiterate   guy rings   tech support to report that his computer is faulty.      Tech: What's the problem?      User: There is smoke coming out of the power  supply.       Tech:   (keep quite)      Tech: You'll need a new power supply.      User: No, I don't! I just need to change the   startup files.      Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll  need to replace it      User: No way! Someone told me that I just  needed to change the startup and it will fix the       problem! All I need is for you to tell me the  command.       Tech support::       10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.           Tech support::(hush hush)     Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our   customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS     command that will fix the problem.      User: I knew it!      Tech   : Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKECOM at     the end of the CONFIG.SYS. Let  me know how it goes.

      10 minutes later.      User   : It didn't work. The power supply is  still smoking.      Tech    : Well, what version of DOS are you using?      User   : MS-DOS 6.22.      Tech   : That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't come with NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft     and ask them for a patch that will give you the  file. Let me know how it goes.     1 hour later.     User  : I need a new power supply.     Tech support   : How did you come to that conclusion?           Tech support  :  (hush hush)      User   : Well, I rang Microsoft and told him   about what you said, and he started asking questions      about the make of power supply.      Tech: Then what did he say?      User: He told me that my power supply isn't   compatible with NOSMOKE.

  15) customer care officer:I need a product  identification number  right now and may I help u in        finding it out?      Cust: sure      CCO: could u left click on start and do u find  'My Computer'?      Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I  find your computer? Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out. Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button? Customer: Yes, sure, nothing happens, it must be really stuck. Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note Customer: No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it's still on my desk... sorry .

Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen. Customer: Is that your left or my left? Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you? Male customer: Hello... I can't print. Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and..... Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates damn it !

Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says it can't find it... Customer: I have problems printing in red ... Helpdesk: Do you have a colour printer? Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.

Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am? Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket. Helpdesk: And now hit F8. Customer: It's not working. Helpdesk: What did you do, exactly? Customer: I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's happening.

Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore. Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer? Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer. Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. Customer: OK Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you? Customer: Yes Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard? Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah ... that one does work!

Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a Capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7. Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters? A customer couldn't get on the Internet: - Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password? Customer: Yes I'm sure. I watched my colleague do it. Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was? Customer: Five stars.

Helpdesk: What anti-virus program do you use? Customer: Netscape. Helpdesk: That's not an anti-virus program. Customer: Oh, sorry ... Internet Explorer. Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears !

Helpdesk: Microsoft Tech Support, may I help you? Old woman: Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you. Can You please tell me how long it will take before you can help me? Helpdesk: Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem? Old woman: I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than 4 hours ago. Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me?

Helpdesk: How may I help you? Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail. Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem? Customer: Well, I have the letter " a ", but how do I get the circle around  


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