Bad client speak: A translation of the things freelance clients say

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Information about Bad client speak: A translation of the things freelance clients say
Business & Mgmt

Published on February 19, 2014

Author: RebekahLambert



What does that client really mean when he/she says that? A bunch of freelance copywriters have shared their insight on what a client really means with the things they say.

what By a bunch of freelance copywriters

I have an urgent job...! Translation: I am shit at timelines and keeping to them

Tell me about what you do Translation: I haven't read your website

There's great reward for the right person Translation: I don't have budget to pay you

I like to get to know who I am working with Translation: I haven't quite worked out what I am doing and want to use you as a sounding board

BIGGER THAN This thing is going to be bigger than Facebook. We want you to take the journey with us and reap the rewards Translation: I may never pay or credit you, unless you lawyer-up 

I've been flat out/in the office on my own/the dog's got a cold Translation: I haven't been arsed to read your proposal/your first draft, or put in the starting deposit

It won't need rewriting, just a bit of editing Translation: It's utterly appalling and should be deleted and never spoken of again. 

Please call me to discuss Translation: I don't really have a clue yet what I'm doing so I'd like to talk rather than write so I can stay vague. 

I want you to write copy like my competitor. But not as my competitor, as me. Translation: I am really not sure why I am in business or why you should choose me over the other guy.

I have done a rough draft to get you started Translation: I have cut + pasted my top competitor's content into a Word doc for you

Would you mind taking a quick look at this Translation: Would you please work on my project for free?

We don't have any competitors Translation: I'm too lazy to have done any market research.

None of my marketing seems to be working Translation: I've tried nothing and I'm out of ideas

Can we meet to discuss the project? Translation: I'm going to pick your expensive brains for the price of a coffee and then do all the work myself to save money

Can we do this over the phone? Translation: I don’t want to put it in writing so I can quibble about specifications later.

I have an idea for a website and... Translation: I want to be in business for myself, I just haven’t thought of the business yet

This freelancer stress relief tool was brought to you by UNASHAMEDLY CREATIVE

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